but i AM using it to post this

This right here. Yep.

I installed 64-bit windows

but i'm not using it to post this.

Outside the Gates of Eden: a one act play i'm about to make up

outside an enormous, ornate gate made entirely out of gold, glass and precious stones (budget allowing). a bored-looking ANGEL stands guard. he registers extreme surprise when a scruffy-looking FREAK approaches.

FREAK (friendly): Hey there.
ANGEL: Wha-- !
FREAK: I was wondering...
ANGEL (interrupting): Who are you?!
FREAK: Oh, I'm Chris, nice to meet --
ANGEL(interrupting): You're supposed to be dead.
FREAK: Thanks pal, you're too sweet. Look, I was--
ANGEL (interrupting): But our Lord destroyed you all! No one is alive outside His city.
FREAK: Yeah, well, the place definitely isn't what it used to be...
ANGEL: He killed you all! Satan's armies gathered to besiege God's city and He smote you all with fire from the heavens!
FREAK: I'm a conscientious objector, man, I wasn't there. Anyway, if you'd just --
ANGEL (interrupting again, with conviction): But it was the final battle! All the unrighteous were destroyed in the final conflict between God's people and the nonbelievers! The old order was ended, the world destroyed! We, His chosen, were the only ones left alive!
FREAK (getting exasperated): Yeah, I remember when all that shit went down, but I was really busy at the time, didn't get involved. Would you please listen to me?
ANGEL (condescending): I suppose you've come to beg admittance to the City of God? It's really no use--
FREAK (interrupting): No man, I just want you to deliver a message.
ANGEL (surprised): A message?
FREAK: Yeah. Tell Yahveh that if He needs bud, we're growing now, and I'll give Him a special deal. You too, Tweekie. You guys all seem like you could use it. See you around, man.

The FREAK exits with a wave over his shoulder. The ANGEL, stunned, returns the wave weakly. Fade.

flying pigs

why is there a helicopter with a searchlight circling a point somewhere a few blocks south of here at 3:30 in the morning? who does one ask to find out such things?

Tip for the Day:

Ranchovies are the result of an unholy union between cow and fish.

things he do

just a few minutes ago the phone rang, and when i picked it up a female voice was saying something about a chair. I heard, "...chair. wicker chair. rocking chair." and then they hung up.
for some reason, i found this highly amusing and vaguely creepy at the same time.